Bring Me to Life

Amber at the Twlight look a like contest at FYE she wanted me to go as Jacob.....

Well Amber told me to post about how much of a kick ass sister she is and hell ya you are!! Thanks for talking to me tonight about life and for helping me cope with stress about school and really got me wanting to do what I really have truly loved more than anything which is READING and WRITING. 

I miss having days of doing nothing but reading and going to the orem library all the time when I use to live with my grandparents. Just the problem was that well I don't know many careers that involved good comprehension and an average speed of 1805 wpms (Amber did the math :p) until I was told about some of the careers (that pay well) that I can go into wish I could remember the names of them....

I think I'm done with the Medical and Math I think I'm gonna major in English now I can't stand Math I've always hated it it's just not my thing I've ALWAYS had someone having to hold my hand and explain it to me and I still never truly learned it. Biology, I'm not doing so well in either and Med Schools expect you to be beyond perfect to be accepted and I can't handle the stress anymore. Part of me was that the only reason why I consider the Medical field was I wanted to make my mom proud and not end up like my dad with no college education. 

Sure its a good motivation but It was not really what I wanted to. I just wanna live my dream of always being surrounded by books and just write about them or just simply about my life. I hate my English class yes it's easy but I DON'T LEARN ANYTHING I wanna transfer into Smith's and actually write something where I feel like my emotions is truly being put into use in the form of writing. I wanna just be able to relax and write! I hope it's not too much to ask but I don't know if I can handle the life of being on call constantly or being away from my future family all the time. 

I can't remember if I'm quoting you right sis but it sends the same message "We truly achieve success and happiness by doing what we love not what pays us the most." She also talked to me about love and friendship! It was really interesting I loved it and kinda got me thinking who my true friends are and who I can say is a true best friend. I shouldn't even have to say who you know who you are. 

Your the ones who talked to me when I was in my personal oblivion of depression and talked to me night and day to make sure I was okay. 

Your the ones who I can be myself around and not feel judged and accept my views. 

Your the ones that don't give up on me when others have and keep me going to help fix my mistakes. 

Your the ones that have a piece of my heart forever because I don't want anyone else to call a best friend but you guys

I love you all and I won't plan on leaving your guy's lives any time soon. 

So new topic I should punch myself in the stomach right now. I was having a fun conversation with a now new friend name Kreslynn, she first came off as a molly mormon who dated my friend Brandon last year. I feel bad for judging her but hey who here doesn't judge first and then feel stupid after realizing the person is the complete opposite that we thought they were?? She's actually pretty damn awesome and chill like me she has seen every episode of South Park HOLY HELL! Likes some metal here and there and was really open about what I talk about and time flew by and we talked for over 10 AMAZING HOURS! I feel so relaxed right now I been reading to some Divine Comedy while listening to some TOOL it was such a great night thanks again Amber your one kick ass sister.